Even Bedard misses his PS3

It's Mediocre Month at We Rite Goode...where in the spirit of things, we're only devoting two weeks to celebrating lousiness. But let's face it: The Baltimore Orioles' recent performance isn't just mediocre. It's unbearably, eye-bleeding awful. And we thought the last ten years were hard.

So...kind of a bad week for the Orioles, hmm?

Let's rewind and mourn together.

* Tuesday: Presumptive AL Cy Young winner Erik Bedard pitches six shutout innings, only to give up two earned runs in the seventh. He strikes out just 11, too, with no walks and five hits. OK--you caught us. Of course, this was a great game. But we fear, perhaps, it was too great...the subsequent utter awfulness didn't allow any O's fan to simply anticipate Bedard's next start. No, we were positively drooling for his return to the mound. More on that later.
* Wednesday: Let's overlook the historic drumming and focus on game 2 of the double-header. The O's first dig out of their early hole, and then rally to lead in the bottom of the 7th...so the bullpen goes out and blows the game in the top of the 8th. 9 runs to a light-hitting Rangers team? Inexcusable.
* Thursday: After the double-header embarrassment, it's a "new day," so the O's find a new way to lose: Don't get any hits off Boof Bonser--he of the 5-10 record and 4.93 ERA--and boot the ball a couple of times.
* Friday: 14 hits...by the bad guys. And Justin Morneau breaks his 28-game homerless streak. Bye bye home run ball, bye bye Jeremy Guthrie shutout and victory.
* Saturday: I'm not even sure what happened here. Did anyone even show up, other than a stand-in pitcher snatched from AA-ball? Did the O's just forfeit the game?
* Sunday: Alright! Presumptive leading Cy Young candidate Bedard on the mound!! Going for his 11th straight win, the team record in Ks!!!...yes...no...oh, spirit of Kenesaw Mountain Landis, have mercy. Not Bedard too. And the fans on Camden Chat were so optimistic.
* Monday: Orioles rest, think of clever ways to drop games against awful Tampa team. Warning, Angelos--bringing in Kyle's cousin only will disappoint.

Hey, Peter Schmuck of the Sun is convinced that this is just some prank gone wild, a hazing for new full-time manager Dave Trembley. And by the power of Wee Willie Keeler, we wish it were so. But more likely, we're nearing talk of 4-32, powerfully depressing numbers in Oriole parts. Which means, it's also time to "look to the future."

Ach bin berliner!! Record blowouts, late-game collapses, obsessing over prospects. When did the O's become the Kansas City Royals?

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posted by Crucifictorious @ 09:28,


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